I sipped my water and we laughed. And then I asked for it. I said "Bring it on. Break my heart. Just do it." So he did. He said everything I feared he was going to say. I stabbed my ice with my straw and looked at him. I looked at my water and I looked at him. And I nodded. In no way did I agree or want to say "yes". But I nodded because that's all I knew how to do. He said "I still think you're awesome and lovely." Lovely? Did he just say lovely? What's that supposed to mean? I tried avoiding his eyes but when I looked up he was looking for something. "Tears?" I asked. I had none. I just smiled. But my face was getting hot. We left and I didn't follow him. When we got to the car I sat on my hands and sighed. He changed the music to AC/DC because it wasn't sad like me. We hugged in my drive way and I knew that was it. I cried on my bed and said "I want my mommy." She lied with me until I fell asleep. The next morning I cried the whole way to work. When I got inside I had finally stopped crying. They asked "Are you okay? Did you get beat up?" So I started crying again. Now I'm all out of tears and in an oddly fine state. I don't want it to be over.